Archive | 9:14 am

DO NOT WANT: Animal print ANYTHING.

2 Oct

Like the “Do Not Want” written about my salty distaste for rattan – this is sure to be a feeling not shared with some of you readers. But I gotta say, boy do I not care for animal print ANYTHING. Even the incorporation of leopard print pumps into the J Crew catalog made my left eye twitch.

$175.00 Bistro Set

If you like animal print, creepers shoes, cat eye glasses, skulls as a viable print pattern for your bed linens, and studded Naugahyde ‘candy apple’ everything, have at it. This will probably work fantastically in your black, red, and white Shag den with black curtains – and, let’s be honest, probably one piece of furniture that has been spray-painted silver.

I do have to tip my invisible hat to the person who redid this Cosco bistro set, though. The paint job looks even and clean, the oil cloth upholstery and table top looks nice and tightly fit.

But. There are only so few circumstances that I would like to 1, sit on a zebra, and 2, eat off a zebra. Mostly having to do with being crowned King of Zebras, getting my own personal zebra court jester for me to perch upon while being amused by “what’s black, white, and red all over” jokes ad nauseum. As for the table, perhaps it will fit into this Royalty of the Savanna daydream I’ve got going after all. For if you were to cut a round out of a zebra like a mighty tree cut into segements, this would likely be the by product. What’s more luxurious than making a table out of your underlings?

Yeah, that’s right. Avert your eyes from my glory.. as ZEBRA KING! Ahhh, sekwenyaaa!
Hakuna matata, y’all.

Early mornin’ trollin.

2 Oct

My man-thang and I are about to leave to go camping for a few days, and I suppose in anticipation – he has opted to sleep in instead. Well, lucky for you I had some time for some righteous solitudinous Craig time. Here we go.

Two tiered end table with some skiiiinny legs. If this table needed to buy a pair of jeans, you’d be sure it’d be looking to buy some stretch fit skinnies. $60.00 in Midtown.

Derp. Yeah, it’s one those little repros, but it’s $25.00 in Reno. That’s pretty dang cheap.

Nine drawer dresser for $325.00 in Auburn. Get up in that there Auburn and smell them trees. Tell ’em I says hey.

$20.00 coffee table in Orangevale. Now, I like them there numbers. Says it needs refinishing, shazam!

Torben Standgaard table for $500.00. I love Danish desks, especially ones with big ol’ writing space on the top. I’d be afraid of indenting the precious teak while writing a lengthy love letter to my sweetheart, but I suppose that’s where those tacky giant desk calendars come in.

Lane Lane go away, come again another day. JOKES – jokes, guys. This is a good lookin’ Lane end table for 45-smackaroos.

Ah, SPAGHET! An acrylic spaghetti string tension pole lamp for $130.00. Yum.

Hope y’all are having a good weekend, and getting amped up for some RAIN! YAYYY!

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