DO NOT WANT: Animal print ANYTHING.

2 Oct

Like the “Do Not Want” written about my salty distaste for rattan – this is sure to be a feeling not shared with some of you readers. But I gotta say, boy do I not care for animal print ANYTHING. Even the incorporation of leopard print pumps into the J Crew catalog made my left eye twitch.

$175.00 Bistro Set

If you like animal print, creepers shoes, cat eye glasses, skulls as a viable print pattern for your bed linens, and studded Naugahyde ‘candy apple’ everything, have at it. This will probably work fantastically in your black, red, and white Shag den with black curtains – and, let’s be honest, probably one piece of furniture that has been spray-painted silver.

I do have to tip my invisible hat to the person who redid this Cosco bistro set, though. The paint job looks even and clean, the oil cloth upholstery and table top looks nice and tightly fit.

But. There are only so few circumstances that I would like to 1, sit on a zebra, and 2, eat off a zebra. Mostly having to do with being crowned King of Zebras, getting my own personal zebra court jester for me to perch upon while being amused by “what’s black, white, and red all over” jokes ad nauseum. As for the table, perhaps it will fit into this Royalty of the Savanna daydream I’ve got going after all. For if you were to cut a round out of a zebra like a mighty tree cut into segements, this would likely be the by product. What’s more luxurious than making a table out of your underlings?

Yeah, that’s right. Avert your eyes from my glory.. as ZEBRA KING! Ahhh, sekwenyaaa!
Hakuna matata, y’all.

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2 Responses to “DO NOT WANT: Animal print ANYTHING.”

  1. Christina October 2, 2011 at 9:25 am #

    Hahaha! Your description of the red black and white themed house is spot on.

  2. toniiii October 3, 2011 at 12:46 pm #

    YESS!! I’m so glad this is back!

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